Mommy-Of-Three

Big bad physical pain yesterday morning before my appointment with urology, big bad psychological pain during the appointment.   Ugly words. Advanced. Aggressive. Invasive. Involved. Topped off with the kindest "I'm sorry."  A doctor searching for answers because I'm "unlike any case he's seen, so atypical." No risk factors.  No family history.  Just bad luck, I guess.  But better news....The urine catheter is gone.  As Pinnochio said, "I've got not strings to hold me back!" Hallelujah!  I came home. I cried. I took my medications. I took a nap.  I woke up, then I peed, all by myself. Into a toilet. Like a normal human. Pain-free pee is good, and I will lifted that praise. I met with palliative care in the afternoon. We discussed pain management and are working on maximizing my pain medications to make my "every day" comfortable and functional.  There is hope that once treatment starts, the chemo and immunotherapy may help reduce ...

I'm one lucky girl. Lucky is an understatement. Lucky is a gross misrepresentation of all the special ways I've been blessed since my diagnosis.   We haven't been extremely outward with information.  Close friends and family.  We've been guarded because there have been some other health care situations going on simultaneously with Jason's dad and that rightfully deserves concern and attention at this time too.  We also didn't know a whole lot of information about my situation.  We were learning details. We were learning next steps. But for those who knew the tsunami of change that was taking over our house, the blessings came in even bigger waves. A visit from my sister, who dropped everything to come spend some hospital days with me. The pastoral care visit and prayer that felt like a pivotal and important part of my hospital stay. The drop-ins and pop-ins to say "hi" and brighten my hospital room from friends, family, and co-workers. A bright cheerfu...

This week's "big moves" involved our initial appointment at The Cleveland Clinic.   Thanks to a quick referral from a close family friend who is the orthopedic oncologist at Johns Hopkins, we were able to speak with the chairperson of oncology at Cleveland Clinic, Dr. Abraham.  Dr. Abraham promptly referred us to his expert team.  We were fortunate to get a quick appointment with Dr. Shilpa Gupta, who is the director of genitourinary medical oncology at Taussig Cancer Institute at Cleveland Clinic.  She has been quite involved in research to study and treat bladder cancer.   Dr. Gupta was closely involved in immunotherapy and genomic therapy for bladder cancer, and she seems very optimistic and positive about many new treatments that have improved outcomes in this field. My initial apprehensions about the Cleveland Clinic were quickly put to rest by friendly smiling faces, helpful people, and a clean, healing environment.   Dr. Gupta laid out...

It's been a long time, 10 years or maybe longer since I've dusted off my keyboard warrior skills and put together a tome worthy of sharing across the interwebs. What a walk down memory lane it was as I re-opened my "Mommy-of-Three" archives- stories of raising my three littles, the trials and tribulations I faced as a young mama, the joys, laughter, jokes and fun, and oh the love.  What a time of my life that was. But now I get to reopen my blog for a little different reason. A word I'm not sure I was fully prepared to hear.  A word I definitely was not fully prepared to comprehend or deal with. CANCER. Bladder Cancer with Bone Cancer. Metastatic Cancer. Every time I say it, it still sound surreal.  I'm 48 years old.  I have 2 kids in college and a senior in high school.  I have a career where I enjoy both the challenge and comfort of caring for tiny babies, and have opportunities to teach and mentor students.  My husband, a varsity coach in our hometown, f...